Tuesday, March 10, 2026

More Necromantic Nonsense: The Profane Dead, the Bacterial Ghost, and the Dinobomb

Last time: New Necromantic Monsters and Factions for Weirder Worldbuilding 

Milieu: The Profanity of the Undead

Inherent to the idea of undeath as traditionally understood in most folklore and derived fiction is a wrongness and a fundamental reversal of what that person (or their society) viewed as natural and holy in life. Undead should not be kinda vaguely, ambiently unholy – they should specifically reject, pollute, or invert the values of their pre-undeath society.

Random table: In what way are these undead profaning what was most holy to them in life?

  1. Ghoul-minotaurs, mouths dripping with beef tallow, worship at a profane altar to Our Lady of the Abattoir. 
  2. Deadwood-dryads and treant snags knock down healthy trees and suck the life out of green shoots.
  3. Revived rust monsters galvanize metals instead of rusting them. Highly prized by dwarven metalworkers who are heretical enough to deal with necromancers. 
  4. Skeleton-fish, repelled by bodies of water, hurl themselves against the doors and windows of the fishermen who caught them, silently begging for their killers to consume flesh they no longer possess.  
  5. Shadow-beholders emit blinding shafts of darkness, haunting living eye tyrants and threatening to deprive them of their most precious sense.
  6. Poltergeist-gargoyles enraged by the physicality the spirit can no longer embody, possess statues across the city, toppling them onto unsuspecting passerby.


A gif of a skeletal fish swimming



Monster: Bacterial Ghosts 

Non-sapient animals generally do not project sufficient soul-stuff to create ghosts. But there are exceptions. For example, when particularly large numbers of microscopic organisms die suddenly, their collective extermination can produce a ghost large enough for people to perceive.

This ghost is amoeba-like, with its “mouth” forming on any of its appendages. It is sometimes mistaken for an ooze. It cannot communicate or even really think in a way that people understand, but can be frighteningly motivated, as undeath seems to give it a collective direction that its constituent organisms lacked in their single-celled lives.

Random table: What is the bacterial ghost doing right now?

  1. Lurking in a pond, consuming algae until they can build a Swamp Thing-like body.
  2. Plotting revenge, hoping to destroy the bleach factory responsible for their innumerable deaths.
  3. Unliving symbiotically on a ghost sloth.
  4. Possessing the micromancer who foolishly bestowed awareness on their colony.
  5. Researching spells with names like “pierce membrane” and “corrupt mitochondria.”
  6. Haunting the innards of the cow where they once dwelt while still alive.

Treasure: Necromantic Clothing and Equipment

Much of the ordinary clothing and gear that people use in their daily lives is obviously derived from living things. Usually such items are too far removed from life to be affected by necromancy. Usually.

A particularly diligent necromancer, taking the time to study the processes behind the creation of clothing, tools, and armor, can add a spark of unlife to such items.

Random table: What necromantic equipment is available for those with the stomach to use it?

  1. Compass armor. Leather armor that retains the ability of the cattle to sense the planet’s magnetic field. The wearer instinctively aligns north-south when standing around idly for a turn or longer.
  2. Silk-shroud robes. Fine silk robes with hidden pockets containing zombie silkworms. The silkworms will spin silk to repair any damage to the robes. With patience, the silkworms can be goaded to reshape the garment; for example, refashioning the robe into strong silk-rope to escape a tower.
  3. Snakeskin belt. When unbuckled, the "clasp" is capable of biting to deliver deadly poison once per day. Wearing tough gloves or carrying antivenom is strongly recommended as it is easy to forget and receive a nasty bite while undressing at the end of a long adventuring day. Stylish.
  4. Naptha bomb. Rock-oil from a natural seep. Looks a lot like alchemists' fire. When thrown like a grenade, the necromantic reagent reanimates whatever ancient animals decomposed into the oil. Unpredictable due to the unknown (and probably cross-contaminated) mix of biological matter that made up the oil, but the best-case scenario can produce a terrifying amalgamation of undead dinosaurs.

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More Necromantic Nonsense: The Profane Dead, the Bacterial Ghost, and the Dinobomb

Last time: New Necromantic Monsters and Factions for Weirder Worldbuilding   Milieu: The Profanity of the Undead Inherent to the idea of un...